Nowadays children are taught this phrase from a very early age, from early childhood education. They put their hand up at same time.
My sister Wendy heard her granddaughter say this very phrase recently. As dad was strapping the granddaughter into her car seat in the family car by her hand went up…. “Stop I don’t like it. I want Granny.”
What a great way for children to learn about boundaries, when they don’t like something being said or what others are doing around them. They learn that people listen to them and respect their no. And “no” means “no”.
Lately I have started saying this when things at times get a tad annoying with difficult situations.
“Stop I don’t like it…” It has a rather good ring to it. I have so far only said it to myself though.
It is very easy as adults not to have good boundaries with our decisions we make and the way we let others treat us at work and at home.
I am still a great believer in making sure we have a healthy self-worth, then when we are asked to do something and it doesn’t suit or we don’t want to do a particular activity we can say so without a feeling guilty. I used to live feeling guilty about a lot of things. I always felt guilty turning someone down. Or that I had made a mistake. But in the end we can become a doormat and run ourselves ragged meeting the needs of others.
So a self-worth check list is a good idea. Questions to ask ourselves are:
Do I put others interests before my own most of the time?
Can I say no without feeling guilty?
Do I let others treat me the way they want to at home and at work, and don’t ever say “Stop I don’t like it?”
Do I let a stronger person have their way to just keep the peace?
Do I believe I am worth being treated respectfully?
Do I like myself the way I am and the way I look? (Do I respect myself?)
These questions are a good starting point. We all have feelings of inadequacy but we mustn’t react to life in that state. A great self-worth is learned and absolutely vital for us to be able to interact with others in a healthy way. Now usually I can say no requests if it isn’t something I don’t want to do or I can’t manage at the moment. It does take a bit of practise and it is also important to be nice about it!
If someone doesn’t treat us like we are a special person of worth, then it might be time for a hand up and …
“STOP. I don’t like it….”